Silly Mom Thoughts

Today was one of those days when I realized Turk and I are good parents raising sweet children. I bask in these days because, especially around the toddler/preschool years, they seem to be few and far between.

Today, Bug didn’t nap. No biggie, he played pretty well by himself and let me finish cleaning and have some quiet time. When Bean woke up, he came running in to the room where I was.

“Mom! Whas dat noise in my ears?”

Bean made a noise from the other room. I waited a little longer, because I wanted to hear the cuteness that was coming from his mouth. Sure enough, there was more.

“Hear dat? It’s in my ears! Yee yee’s awake! Hurry!”

I lifted Bean from her Pack ‘n Play nap spot and Bug leaned in to hug her.

“I missed you, Yee yee!” he exclaimed, his arm around her. He then kissed her on the head.

She leaned into him and gave him a kiss back, and that was when my heart melted into a gooey puddle on the floor.

Later, after a good play outside, they were standing in the kitchen with me and Bean wrapped her arms around her brother’s waist. He reciprocated and kissed her on the head again. “I wuv you, Yee yee!”

I couldn’t stand it. I knelt down and wrapped them both in a gigantic hug. There was a whole lot of kissin’ and huggin’ going on in that little love circle.

Then, as if this all weren’t sweet and ooey gooey enough, Bean did another cute thing. It was her turn to get out of the bath and I asked her to stand up so I could wrap her in the towel.

“Bye bye!” she said to the bathtub and I smiled.

Then, she leaned down and kissed the water and left with a final, “Bye bye!”

Cute, right?

Dang, I love these days. It is an amazing break from the usual hitting, biting, screaming, tantruming, and lack of sharing that goes on around these parts most days of the week.

When Bug first started potty training last year, I vowed to never ever offer extrinsic rewards for going on the potty. No sticker charts, no toys, and especially no candy. I wanted him to go on the potty and feel intrinsically rewarded, I wanted him to do it for himself because he felt good about it. That all sounded well and good, and it worked for a little while, but then the poo accidents started. And continued. They were gross.

Since January, Bug hasn’t gone #2 on the potty more than once or twice per week. The rest of the time, often more than once per day, he was droppin’ dukes in his pants like “Woops, did I do that?” It was frustrating, disgusting, and incredibly disheartening. Last week, I reached my breaking point, when Bug caught a… well, bug, and had some really great surprises for me in his pants. I’ll spare you the gruesome details, but lets just say they often involved an impromptu shower to clean him off.

Saturday, Turk and I were talking about this little issue and he suggested we try a different tactic. Obviously, nothing we were doing was working, no matter how patient we were with his accidents. And frankly, I cannot take the mess anymore.

“The YMCA daycare gives the kids a Gummi Bear if they poop on the potty,” Turk said.

“No, I don’t want to reward him with candy,” I replied flatly.

“Well, nothing else is working,” he reasoned.

Good point.

“Alright, we’ll give it a try,” I conceded.

Sunday, I picked up a ginormous pack at Target. I brought it home and Bug’s eyes boggled.

“What’s dat?!” he asked.

“Gummi Bears ,” I replied. “You get one when you poop on the potty.”

Bug ran straight for the bathroom, sat on the toilet and grunted like a caveman.

“I can’t do it, Mama!” he groaned.

“That’s okay, buddy, they’ll still be here when you do have to go.”

He didn’t have to go all night and I thought maybe the novelty of the treat idea had worn off on him. Then, this morning I heard him pad to the bathroom and do his business.

Yessss! Finally!

I patted his back, told him how proud I was, wiped him up and led him back to his room.

Maybe he forgot about the Gummi Bears after all, I thought.

He looked up at me with those huge blue eyes, still droopy from sleep, and said, “Mommy, I get a Gummi Bear now?”

“Yes, buddy, you get a Gummi Bear,” I said, and handed him his potty reward.

Once upon a time, I said never. I should know better by now than to say “never” to anything. Apparently, he is a reward-driven kind of kid, and for right now, I’ll do whatever it takes if it means not having to clean up poo messes all day long.

This is slightly off-topic, but it does have to do with Gummi Bears. Do you remember the Gummi Bear show? “Gummi Bears, bouncing here and there and everywhere…” Turk and I were just talking about that show last night. Too funny.

My three-year-old is a sponge, soaking up anything and everything that piques his interest. Sometimes I am caught of guard by his sponginess. He will repeat something that I said, or an action that he saw, when I thought he wasn’t even paying attention. The other day, for instance, he said out of nowhere, “It’s the night before Kissmas and all tru da house, not a criture was stuw-ing, not eben a mouse!” Needless to say, I was impressed.

Sometimes, though, he soaks up things I’d rather he didn’t. Like the other morning, when I was having my 5:25am tantrum I muttered the  “S” word under my breath when I was lifting up a child safety gate. The next morning, Bug walked up to the gate, grumbled, “Sit!” and stomped off.

Bug has a little friend who loves to add words to “head.” His favorite is “poophead.” Yesterday, this friend was over and soon after he left, Bug looked at me smiling and said, “Poophead!” I realized that he was testing this new cool word out and didn’t quite understand the meaning behind it, so I told him sternly to never say that word again, or he would be in trouble. I explained that it wasn’t a nice word to call someone at all.

Later that evening, the kids were in the tub and Bug looked at Bean and yelled, “Poophead!” Honestly, I think he thought it was a funny word, something that was more silly than insulting. But, I don’t want him going around saying that, so I plucked him out of the bath, wrapped him in a towel, and sent him off to time out.

He was crushed! Bath time is the happy hour of toddlers, something they look forward to after a long day of tantrums and being waited on hand and foot. When Mama takes away bath time, she means business.

After his time out sentence was served, he came back in to the bathroom and apologized to Bean and me. I put him in PJs and we watched Bean splash around in the bath for a while and he laughed at his silly little sister. That’s when he said it.

“You’re a-” he paused, thinking, and I prayed that he was not going to say the word he just got in trouble for saying, “Silly head!”

I was so proud. He sat and thought about the words before he said them. My punishment worked. I hugged him, kissed him, praised him for thinking before he spoke. I told him “silly head” is just fine, especially since our family is full of silly heads. The rest of the night, he giggled and called his sister a “Silly head” every time she was acting like a nut.

The only problem?

With Bug’s unique speech, “Silly head” actually sounds like, “Sh!t head.”

Oh well, it’s the true meaning that counts, right?

…is the time I was rudely awakened from a delicious dream. There I was standing in line at McDonald’s , eating Cup ‘O Noodles, trying to decide if I wanted a McDouble Cheeseburger, fries, or Chicken McNuggets. I was about to order all of the above, when my bedroom door swung open, sending me abruptly from dreamland to Mommyland.

Bug was awake.

At 5:25 am?!

We have been working with him on night training and apparently his little body woke him up to go pee. I helped him to the potty and then sent him back to his room.

“I want moke,”  he whined

“You can have milk later, buddy, it’s waaay too early right now,” I whispered, trying not to wake Bean up, who was sleeping just feet away.

I left the room and peeked into the bathroom. Turk was up getting ready for work.

“I hate tax season!” I hissed at him through the crack in the door. “You getting ready this early wakes the kids up!”

(In his defense, that wasn’t the case today, but it is usually the case.)

I plopped down onto the bed and closed my eyes. Bean started whimpering. Then crying. Bug came back into our room.

There is something you should know about me. Unless you are sick, teething, an infant, or have a damn good reason, you do not mess with my sleep. I need my sleep. Especially when I have twins cooking in my uterus.

Bean quieted down and I assumed she put herself back to sleep. Turk got Bug some milk and cereal and set him up in the next room to watch cartoons.

It was 5:41am. There are no cartoons on TV and I was so not dealing with Bug’s whiny tantrums all day because he didn’t get enough sleep. I went into the next room and turned off the TV. Bug flipped out and I lost my temper a bit, not my finest Mommy Moment. I told him to calm down (not in a calm voice myself, like that’s ever going to work), he freaked out more and woke up Bean who started screaming.

I stomped into the kitchen, warmed up some milk to put in a sippy cup for Bean, while Bug whined and freaked out next to me. Turk slipped out the front door with an “I love you. Hope you have a good day.” I will bet he ran down the steps as fast as his legs would take him. I would have.

Soon, I calmed down. Bug and Bean calmed down. I put him back in his room and plopped back into my bed.

My clock read 6:11 am and after all the adrenaline and getting upset, I was wide awake. Man!

Despite the rocky start to the morning, I was able to doze until 7:45, an unheard of feat. At one point, Bug crawled back into bed with me, but was good and quiet and snuggled. What could have been a bad morning, actually turned out okay.

Except that I haven’t been able to shake this insane craving for McDonald’s food…

Something miraculous is happening in my house as I type this. Brace yourself, this is huge. Are you ready? Okay. Both Bug and Bean are napping soundly, leaving me to blog and eat delicious Toblerone chocolate in a peacefully quiet house. Oh, how few and far between these glorious days are! To add to the wonderfulness of today, the sun is shining and I haven’t had my usual morning sickness for two whole days now. Somebody pinch me, I must be dreaming.

Since we have spent far too much time indoors lately, watching endless amounts of TV and Disney movies, I decided to pack the kids up and head for the playground this afternoon. Although I know my kids love going to the park, I always dread going without another adult to chat with. It’s so boring! They aren’t nearly old enough to where I can sit on a bench nearby and peruse through a magazine, so instead I find myself standing near the playground equipment watching them go up and down the slides. Of course, I cheer them on and interact with them, but it gets a little repetitive after a while.

Today there was another mother at the playground with her two children. Immediately, her kids ran up to Bug and whisked him off to play with them. It was adorable, I have never met such friendly kids in my life. Now, Bug is normally a friendly kid who gets along with most anyone, but he and the little boy his same age hit it off famously. They were holding hands, hugging, sliding down the slide together, it was too sweet.

Meanwhile, the mom and I chatted. She was cool and friendly. She told me how she grew up in another country and her children were bilingual, which pushed her cool-quotient through the roof. Her husband has season tickets for the Seahawks, Turk and I have season tickets for the Seahawks. They live only a few blocks from us. Our sons were born within two weeks of each other. We chatted on and on and our boys continued to play.

We then reached that weird part of any coincidental meeting at the park: To trade phone numbers or not to trade phone numbers. It’s the part of interacting at the playground that I dislike. It feels so much like dating to me. Playground dating.

I hate being forward, so it feels awkward for me to blurt out, “Hey, we should get together again since our kids play so well together. What’s your phone number?” Instead, I tested the waters a bit. “Wow, we should get these boys together again and do a play date or something,” I chuckled, so she could either take what I said seriously, or just chuckle along with me and ignore my remark.

I watched nervously from the corner of my eye as she reached for her phone. Holy moly, did I just make a new friend? Sure enough, her next words were, “Why don’t you give me your number and we’ll meet up again?”

Yessss! I made a playground date! Despite speaking in toddler babble all day, I am not completely socially inept! What a relief. We traded phone numbers with the promise to get in contact soon.

As far as playground dating goes, I think 2nd base involves meeting up again in a public place. If that works, we round 3rd base and schedule a play date at one of our homes.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Having kids truly forces you to open up socially. Although I’m fairly outgoing as an adult, I was painfully shy as a child. Sometimes, especially in unfamiliar situations, I find myself resorting back to that shyness. But, if I bring my kids along, there’s simply no option to be shy. If Bug is playing nicely (or sometimes not-so-nicely) with another person’s child, it would be awkward of me to not give the other parent at least a grin or some sort of acknowledgement (and sometimes an “I’m so sorry!” if Bug wasn’t being so nice).

I have been around parents who very clearly do not want to be interacted with. I always attempt a “Hello” or some sort of nonverbal communication, but there are some times when parents are off-the-charts antisocial. I was once at a children’s museum with Bug and my son and hers were playing nicely together. I tried to give her a friendly grin, and in response she made her kid stop playing and go somewhere else. She would physically move her child away from Bug any time they came in close proximity to each other. Now that was by far the weirdest interaction I have ever experienced.

No matter, though, there are plenty of Mama Fish in the sea (like the uber cool one I met today!).

My life is so random, why shouldn’t my blog also be? A few updates on my crew, my twins, and me.

Twins Update (or I’m So In Love With Those Heartbeats):

Yesterday, I saw my OB for the first time. How funny is that? Here, I’ve been to the doctor three times, had two ultrasounds and still haven’t actually seen my OB. Turns out, he and his wife just welcomed a baby the same time I was needing to come in, so our schedules crossed.

He sat down with me for close to an hour and simply chatted about my previous pregnancies, concerns I have, anything I want him to know. He had already thoroughly looked through my previous medical charts and explained things to me (like why I bled so severely after Bug was born) that no other doctor has taken the time to. We talked about my previous bout with postpartum depression and he said he would like to put me on antidepressants before the babies arrive so we can be proactive. I hate putting drugs into my system, but I know how awful PPD was and I have a feeling I won’t be spared this time either.

I asked when he usually delivers twins and he said he’ll let me go as long as we’re all safe and healthy, up to 39 weeks. He anticipates it will be closer to 36 weeks, since twins usually come early, but I will bet money they’ll have to be evicted around 39 weeks. (If Bug and Bean are any indication, my babies like to bake as long as possible.) So, that leaves me 29 weeks or less until we become a family of six!

He told me he usually does an ultrasound during the checkup, but since I had one recently, he didn’t feel that was necessary. I asked if we could at least try to pick up heartbeats and he said that we could certainly try. After my girly checkup and all that fun stuff, he was getting ready to leave and had totally forgotten about my heartbeat request. Bashfully, I asked, “Umm, can we please try to find the heartbeats?” my face turning all red like it always does.

He pulled out the doppler and began searching. I could hear my heartbeat loud and clear, but no babies at all. I started sweating bullets, worried that we wouldn’t find them. Soon enough, a beautiful swooshing came over the monitor. “There’s a baby!” the doctor smiled and moved the doppler around this way and that to find the other one. I remembered how difficult it was to see the other twin on the ultrasound, so I was less worried this time. But, another swooshing came over the monitor. It was so incredibly fast, I thought the doppler was picking up both babies at the same time. “Nope, that’s just one baby,” the doctor explained. Turns out, one baby’s heartbeat was around 140-150 and the other was more like 160-170.

It’s SO a boy and a girl.

Bug Update (or Potty Training Frustration):

Can someone please tell me why this kid won’t poop in the potty?! It is so dang frustrating and disgusting, to say the least. I don’t have any idea what to do to help him “get it” that it isn’t okay to poop in your pants. Ugh.

Bean Update (or Potty Prodigy):
Bean is her usual silly self. She, oddly enough, has pooped on the potty twice in the past week, despite the fact that she’s only 16 months old. I am so taking her potty training interest and running with it! I would much rather not have three in diapers come August/September.

Turk Update (or Working Hard for the Money):

Tax season is in full swing and Turk is working his booty off. He has been wonderful, helping me out when he gets home and letting me just pass out on the couch while he gets the kids ready for bed and cleans up the dishes and laundry. I don’t know how I snagged this one, but he’s a keeper.

Me Update (or Somebody Call the Waaaah-mbulance):

Though I have about one day of relief a week, I am still dealing with morning sickness and exhaustion. I’m worried that after I’m through this phase, I’m going to be ruined for ginger, ginger ale, crackers, bagels, cream cheese, and all the other stuff I have been living off of, for the rest of my life! To add to my attempt at morning sickness relief, I picked up some Preggie Pops at Babies ‘R Us. First of all, one of the flavors was Lavender. I’m sorry, but if saltine crackers are barely appealing to me, Lavender is far from appealing. Ew. Even the other flavors, though tasty, were not effective. Ah well, looks like I’ll have to keep trying new things until I’m over the morning sickness or until I find something that works.

Other than that, things are going pretty well. We have had some bumps in the road the past week, but nothing we can’t overcome. I’m so glad we have a number of months before the twins are born, so we can save up money and really be prepared. They had better not try to come super early, dog gone it. *wink*

Man, has today ever been one of those days. I should have seen it coming, after all with my morning sickness and Don’t mess with Mommy, she’s exhausted-ness the past two (plus) weeks, it would be strange if everything didn’t come to a nasty head at some point. Today was the day it all broke loose.

Bug is testing me like never before today. I’m sure he’s crabby from not getting enough sleep this weekend, and being cooped up in the house for days on end with a lame Mommy who can barely stand to make lunch, let alone do fun crafts and play. Today, I put Bug in time out three times before Noon. He had five spankings before Noon.

After Noon, it didn’t get much better. He’s into this thing, where I tell him to do something, and he decides to try to spit at me, kick at me, scream bloody murder, and otherwise turn into a holy terror. Today was the mother of all holy terror days and I feel like a majority of the day has been getting upset with him. It’s so frustrating.

A big part of what is getting him in trouble today is his use of the word “stupid.” He first learned this word from Jim Carrey’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas where he’s talking about Christmas and pointing at the Whos saying “Stupid, stupid, stupid!”  We stopped watching The Grinch when Bug started saying this word, but still, it has stuck with him. He says it mostly when he gets frustrated. I have tried talking calmly to him, telling him that we don’t use that word, that if he’s frustrated, he simply needs to ask for help and I would be happy to help him. I have also tried getting upset with him about it, like today, which only results in him sitting in time out, spitting and yelling “STUPID, STUPID, STUPID!”

After he has it out of his system and I have ignored him long enough for him to realize that it doesn’t work on me, he is falling over himself with apologies. Big huge hugs and “I’m sorry Mommy”s, everything to make my heart melt. But then, an hour later, he’s back at it again.

Aaaaarrrrghhh!!!

I don’t want my kid to be that kid who says naughty words in class! I suppose he could be saying worse things, goodness knows I have let a few zingers slip by accident in his presence, but still. He’s a nice boy, he shouldn’t be calling things or people stupid. That’s just stupid, erm, I mean silly!

If there is a silver lining to this situation (and there always is, if you look hard enough), I am actually not feeling as crummy today as I have been. Last Monday I felt pretty good too, I wonder if there’s something with the development of the babies that gives me a bit of a reprieve once a week. Granted, at five o’clock this morning I was crouched in front of the toilet trying to make myself throw up, just so I could feel better, which never happened. Fortunately, as the day has gone on and I have more food in my stomach, that seems to have gotten better.

In other news: The blog looks different, huh? Well, after much stalling on my part to switch over to the required universal Today.com theme, I finally gave in and did it, since it’s going to be switched soon anyway. It’s not as clean looking as my other theme, for which I apologize, but I will tweak it here and there to get it looking as purdy as I can with what I have control over. If anyone has an idea for a banner that would be snazzy (to replace the shooting stars), let me know!

On Friday, January 30th, The Early Show on CBS interviewed Kate Gosselin of Jon & Kate + 8. At the beginning of the interview, one of her daughters (Alexis) can be seen pushing her brother and otherwise acting naughty. In response, Kate politely asked the interviewer to hold on for a second while she leaned over, took hold of Alexis’ shoulder, and sternly told her to stop misbehaving. (To see the video of this interview, click here .)

There is some controversy surrounding Kate Gosselin’s little parenting tactic. Many will argue that Kate grabbing her daughter’s shoulder was too harsh and therefore bad parenting. They also look down on Maggie Rodriguez’s response to the action, where she applauded Kate Gosselin for her seemingly effective shoulder grab. (I say “seemingly effective” because at the end of the interview, Kate scolds Alexis again and gives her the mother of all “Mommy death looks.”)

Was Kate too harsh on Alexis during the interview? Personally, I don’t think so. Now, I’m not for abusing your kids at all, but if you watch how Kate grabs her shoulder, it isn’t with a death grip, but strong enough to make a point. She doesn’t hold on and squeeze her daughter, she lets go with a warning to behave. By all appearances, Alexis deserved the discipline she received. She was tormenting her brother and simply being a stinker. Maybe to some people this wouldn’t warrant such a response from Kate, but there’s something else to consider in this situation: We have no idea what Alexis was doing or saying before the interview. For all we know, she was a holy terror all morning long and this was simply the last straw for Kate.

As for Maggie Rodriguez’s response to Kate grabbing her daughter’s shoulder? What else was she supposed to say? Even if she disagreed with the action, she can’t say so during a live interview! It is my personal opinion that Maggie Rodriguez did an excellent job of pulling off an otherwise distracting and difficult interview.

Although I think Kate Gosselin can be a bit of a you-kn0w-what, especially to Jon, I find her to be extremely inspirational. On days when I feel as though I cannot handle my two children, I think of Kate chasing after eight children. Whose life is more crazy? Uhm, hers. I can guarantee I would be a bit bitchy too, if I were in her shoes.

No, sicko, not that kind of quickie. Just a quick post from me today.

Just wanted to let you know, after the fiasco-filled Friday, the weekend has gone much better. I haven’t had any real bouts with nausea, which helps my tolerance level significantly. Plus, having Turk home to take on half the parental duties makes all the difference!

I have to share with you something so sweet that Bug said to me today. (Warning, this is a teeny bit gross at first.) When I get pregnant, I don’t usually throw up, but instead, I do that weird burp-up-crap-into-my-mouth thing. (Does that happen to anyone else, or is it just me?) It’s almost as if my stomach decides too late that it is topped off, and responds by sending the last little bit back up through my throat. It’s nas-tay and close enough to barfing to make me feel gross.

Anyway, this puke in the mouth thing happened to me tonight just after dinner and I rushed to the bathroom. Turk followed and asked, “Are you okay? Do you need some water?”

Immediately, I heard Bug’s little feet running toward the bathroom. I stepped out of the doorway and saw him standing there with his water sippy cup in hand, offering it to me.

“You need wa-er, Mommy? You no fee’ good?”

He did this all on his own, Turk didn’t ask him to bring me water, or make any sort of indication that Bug should do so. I hugged my sweet little guy and thanked him so much for being so thoughtful.

He can be so dang frustrating, but it’s moments like these that make such a difference to me. I am grateful that we are raising a selfless, empathetic little boy.

—

In other news, I decided to start my own website! If you want to check it out, it’s http://lindsaymaddox.com . I will be using it to promote this blog, my other online articles, and my published writing. Plus, I have a “grown-up” blog over there too! I’m movin’ up in this little writer’s world of mine.

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. Here’s to a new week!

It has been one of those days…

Today started off well. We went over to my friend’s house and Bug and Bean played with her boys. We had breakfast, went for a walk, and made lunch. The only thing that was a little annoying was that Bug, for the 4th time this week, pooped in his pants. Why he is pooping in his pants, I do not know, but I do know that it is incredibly frustrating.

Around 2pm, the kids were melting down, and it was time to go. I stepped on to the front porch, glanced at my car, and saw that one of my rear tires was flat. Sweet. I backed it into their garage where Dani and I (oh, and did I mention she’s 5 months pregnant) hoisted my car up on a jack to install the spare. Annoying, but doable. As it turned out, the spare was also flat. Double sweet.

So, I loaded my original flat tire and the spare tire into Dani’s car, and took Bean along with me too, leaving Bug to play with the boys a little longer. The idea was for Bean to nap while my tires were getting fixed. Unless you consider the minute doze-off session before we pulled into Les Schwab Tire a “nap” she didn’t get one.

Instead of napping, my lovely little Bean decided to run around Les Schwab. Not a super big deal normally, but today my body decided to doll out some awesome “morning” sickness. (I put “morning” in quotes because that’s pretty much a joke. It’s “all day” sickness, ask any pregnant woman.) So, I’m trying to keep Bean entertained, but still safe inside the tire place, while fighting the urge to vomit.

I don’t know if you’ve ever been to, or heard of Les Schwab, but they offer free popcorn and beverages while you wait. Super awesome, right? Well, not when your curious little Bean decides to pick up every single piece of popcorn dropped on the floor and try to stick it in her mouth. To make things even more challenging, these people showed up with their dog, not a seeing eye dog, mind you, just a normal ‘ol pet. Bean, being the animal lover she is, kept trying to venture over to the dog, whose owner informed me that her dog doesn’t do well with kids. Okay, understandable, and thank you for letting me know, but seriously. Why did you have to bring your damn dog in here? Argh.

Okay, an hour later, the spare is refilled and the Les Schwab guy tells me the other tire is toast, which means we have to replace all of our tires. Whatever, I just want to get home.

I head back to Dani’s, put the spare on (who says girls can’t change a flat?), and wrangle my kids up once again. Bug has pooped. In his pants. Again. I nearly lost my mind. I swiftly, and not very nicely, got him cleaned up and pants back on, though this time with no underwear because he used up the spare pair I had brought.

No big deal, I thought, we’re just going home anyway. And loaded the kids in the car.

On the drive home, I thought,  Man, I need a drink.

I’m not an alcoholic, but if you have ever raised a toddler/preschooler/any child, you know what I mean when I tell you it was “one of those days.” Obviously, in my prenatal state, I cannot divulge in a lovely Vodka Collins (heavy on the Vodka, light on the Collins). Instead, I decided to treat myself to some of my favorite foods.

First, I called the pizza place to order a garlic chicken ranch pizza. No one in the house likes it, but today I don’t give a crap.

Second, I headed to the grocery store for some sparkling apple cider and Ferrero Rocher chocolates. The drive had put my patience level a bit higher, so I told Bug he could walk next to the cart, so long as he promised to listen to me. Remember how he wasn’t wearing underwear? Yeah, so he was skipping around the grocery store, mooning anyone who happened to be behind him. Once I realized it, I made him stay in the cart.

At the checkout, the people in front of us took for freaking ever to check out. They used three different forms of payment, couldn’t find a debit card at first, had to go find it… I was about to lose my mind again. I took my pseudo-death stare off of the dumbasses in front of me, just in time to see Bug pull his pants all the way down to his ankles.

You know, because the grocery store, including the little old lady behind us, really needed to see Bug’s junk today.

Come on. Can a girl get a break here?!

I fed the kids, Turk came home, and I passed out on the couch at about 6:30 until I woke up to the kids screaming at eachother, or me, or somebody, it didn’t matter who. I changed them into their pajamas and shipped them off to bed, Turk took care of the rest.

Tomorrow will be so much better. It has to be, right?